What is Sidney Crosby Hiding?

Can we figure out from the word salad of “Marketa” what it is Crosby is hiding? Maybe there just might be a lesson in all this for public relations firms that the truth left alone may be less harmful that what you lead people to assume.

Previously, I introduced you to an outrageous character named “Marketa Barborikova Linden Windsor” who had been posting on the Sidney Crosby board at Talk-Sports. “Marketa” claims to be a public relations professional. She also claims that Sidney Crosby is stalking her and she is suing him for $1.5 million dollars, she is a super model, a singer, a fashion designer, an actress, the Czech national hockey team promoter, an Olympic swimmer, an Olympic sports caster, water polo player, equestrian, an extreme sports enthusiast, owner and manager of various businesses and finally a member of the Royal Windsor family.

Amongst all those exciting, noble and haughty professions, pass-times and titles; Why a public relations practitioner? It does beg the question; Does it not? In amongst all of her ranting about the famous athletes she has dated, her mezzo-soprano voice, the release of her album, her time on the London stage, the haute couture designers she has modeled for, the famous people she does lunch with. In amongst these delusional ramblings of her accomplishments and word salads concerning Sidney Crosby she makes a clear and lucid statement that she is a public relations firm owner. How exactly does that fit in with everything else?

The answer is in the law. “Marketa Linden”, obviously not her real name, would lose her right to ever practice in any form of marketing to the public or public relations if ‘she’ were to be caught by the Federal Trade Commission marketing to the public without informing them that is what she is doing and so she declares exactly that; I am a marketer at work on the Internet. In the midst of ‘her’ deceitful shenanigans, including the use of a picture of an intellectually handicapped teenager as ‘her’ image and exploiting stereotypes of mental illness she somehow sees fit to pay some twisted form of lip service to a prohibition to deceitful marketing. Moral turpitude is fine so long as consumers have all been warned that you are an advertiser doing your advertising thing. Drop malicious cookies, pose as someone else in the midst of consumers, Guerrilla market Kathy Leutner, exploit the handicapped and the mentally ill for your purposes, hack computers, harass and torment people who did no wrong but at all times make sure they know you are in the advertising business. “Marketa Linden”, the stalwart of ethical standards; or at least to the extent of ‘her’ assured wellbeing.

“Marketa” is well short on the truth except where it concerns her occupation. Anyone can look up “Marketa Linden” in their web browser and what they will find is a slew of web pages with bizarre personal history and comments about Sidney Crosby and a woman who is purported by Marketa to be Sidney Crosby’s girlfriend named Kathy Leutner. The outrageous and sometimes comical ramblings are designed to confuse and cause anyone in their right mind to completely disregard them as the ranting of a madwoman.

Why might she do this if she works for the benefit of Sidney Crosby? What is the purpose of running around the Internet on various blogs, Twitter accounts and fan boards and placing bizarre, rambling posts containing “Sidney Crosby” within a disjointed but lexically consistent jumble of words?

The answers to those questions lay in how search engines on the Internet work. When a web page is created the author of the web page puts “tags” on the web page such that when anyone looks up those words singularly or especially in combination with each other that web page will show up. Search engines also review the contents of the page for words.

How far up the search engine priority any one page shows up depends upon a few factors such as frequency of the words searched in conjunction with each other, this is referred to as relativity. Also how often any page is clicked on pushes it up the search engine rank. Eventually the more relevant pages temporally, in key words and traffic volume will push other less relevant pages into oblivion. If two pages appear to be identical then a DNS will ultimately remove one of the pages. It should be noted, however, that any web page regardless of the relevancy or legitimacy of its content can be pushed up the search engine by paying Google for its placement ahead of other web pages with the same tags and similar content.

In my next press release I will take a look at what tags and key words “Marketa” has been pumping out, ad nausea, in relation and conjunction with the name Sidney Crosby. A very clear pattern of about forty to fifty reoccurring words begin to emerge from the gobbledygook. What is certain is that it is not one issue that is being buried in “Marketa’s” nonsense.

For now, however, lets just look at the Czech blog that was referred to in my earlier press release bearing in mind that “Marketa” does indeed work for a public relations firm and that is all we really know about her for certain.

The following is the translated excerpt and it is taken from Idnes.cz blog for “Marketa Linden”. It should be noted at this point that the translations of all of ‘her’ Czech language blogs are lucid, comprehensive and intelligent as contrasted to her English language posts, particularly in regards to Sidney Crosby. In one exchange with other bloggers “Marketa” also demonstrates some very sophisticated computer skills in inserting a paragraph about herself into a Czech newspaper article.

Translated from Czech to English: Where brackets the word has been edited for adult content.

“Sometimes things will hit you from the so-called half a poached celebrities like Mel Gibson, for years seen as a faithful husband and a Catholic or Tiger Woods. Now we wait on the scandal with the name Sidney Crosby, who is known backstage as a (enthusiastic alcohol consumer) and a similar user of (companion services). His advantage is that he has not signed a contract as a Woods and is not married, but uses (companion services), and sees women as an input into their (deleted) will not help his image construed as created by the idol of the children and the shape of the NHL. Not everything can be swept under the carpet, and a bigger shock comes when someone like Mel Gibson during one of his captures by police, (inebriated) as a dog, proves to be a racist lout. Companies may be forgiving of someone as young and weird as Patrick Kane and hide the dirt than for someone like Crosby who appears as Mr. Right in a suit and ironed it but is really a homemade tyrant. The first type, the public says, ‘Well, we saw the (alcohol) and some woman he was holding in celebration of the Stanley Cup. He is a baby and immature. He will grow.’ Management will send him to rehab, explain the situation, they say I’m sorry and send him to do three charity events and one for alcoholics, inviting the media for everything, as he repents and keeps his mouth shut. In the second, woman will resent him because he beat up or physically attacked his mate.”

We can now safely assume that Sidney is not the Bay Boy he has been sold to us as. His own public relations firm tells us so. “Marketa” has just told us above that Sidney Crosby has issues with alcohol, pays for illegal companion services and is a tyrant that assaulted his girlfriend? If there is another interpretation of the above paragraph I am open to it.

Why have I assumed it to be the public relations firm of Sidney Crosby and not some malicious person with a vendetta against Crosby? In all of “Marketa’s” voluminous English language ranting on the Internet, she actually manages to say absolutely nothing about Sidney Crosby that anyone can sink their teeth into or that any person might, at a superficial glance, regard with any credibility. If this was someone whose intention was to actually harm the image of Sidney Crosby, surely they would have managed by now to put a few synthesized and lucid sentences together in the English language. They seem to do well enough in the Czech language. Should we believe they are just using a really bad translator?

“Marketa Linden” works for Sidney Crosby and like Sidney Crosby’s image, her efforts are a carefully designed ruse. A ruse meant to bury something else that had been put out on the Internet that Sidney Crosby, the Pittsburgh Penguins and the NHL do not want the public to know about Sidney Crosby.

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